I decided to answer the Proust Questionnaire – the Vanity Fair adapted version + some questions of the original one. Perhaps one day I will answer it again and see how much I’ve changed (or not):
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
a cabin, hot tea, a pile of books and the knowledge that whatever happened/will happen i did/will do what it’s within my reach.
What is your greatest fear?
not being understood. (one could say it’s actually my weakness)
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Which living person do you most admire?
xavier dolan. (tomorrow it will be someone else probably)
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
refusal to look at themselves/their patterns in order to grow.
What is your greatest extravagance?
What is your favorite journey?
the one that teaches me something.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
calling yourself virtuous.
On what occasion do you lie?
fortunately, i learned that i (and most people) lie when they fear other people’s reactions. also, when i am not in the mood for talking and just want to get it over with.
What do you dislike most about your appearance?
today: my hair. usually: my thighs and feet.
Which living person do you most despise?
i don’t despise anyone specific. just the good ol’ racist homophobic conservative rich people.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
What is your greatest regret?
at this point, i don’t think i have any that really keeps me up at night.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
the sense of amazement. art.
When and where were you happiest?
it’s hard to pin this one down. between ages 5 & 8, when i lived in the U.S. for three months and some very specific days from 2013.
Which talent would you most like to have?
the ability to let go. also, drawing better.
What is your current state of mind?
a little numb about life. just tired of work. hoping to rest a couple of days.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
to trust my instincts more.
If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
that they could accept me better and look for solutions for their problems outside of church.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
to put myself first and not think of me as a selfish bitch (most of the time).
If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?
i have no idea. a tree?
If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?
a snail. a cat. a tree. a bird.
What is your most treasured possession?
my health and my consciousness.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
acting on desperation.
Where would you like to live?
What is your favorite occupation?
coloring and writing.
What do you most value in your friends?
openness; an understanding of vulnerability.
Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
buffy; idgie threadgoode (probably will change tomorrow).
What is it that you most dislike?
How would you like to die?
after a day contemplating life at the window.
What is your motto?
you are what you love.
My favorite names:
Julia, Laura, Clarissa – I’ve written about this before.
My favorite food and drink:
My favorite painters:
van gogh; frida kahlo.
My favorite poets:
cummings; angelou; dickinson; neruda; plath.
My favorite bird:
I don’t know much of birds, but if they are blue, they are cute.
My favorite flower:
My favorite color:
blue; green; purple.
The quality that I desire in a man or a woman:
for both: willingness to learn.
The principal aspect of my personality:
i trust that people will do their best.
listening while writing: Tiê – Dois + Passarinho